You Wanna Know Why I Hate the Lakers?

Hate.
Such a strong word. Such a powerful word. Such an overused word.

"I hate lima beans."

"I hate James Blunt."

"I hate it when my hair flips out on the sides."

People toss the word around everyday, just as common as the sun rises and sinks. You know the saying that it takes more work to love than it does to hate? Well, it takes more effort to discuss the pleasantries of life than it does to rip on the neo-maxie zoomed dweebie who works in Membership Accounting while huddled around the water cooler with your work cronies. I mean seriously, is it cool to rip on everyone and everything because you think it sounds cool to? It's like that scene in Hitch when Albert and Alegra go to the art show and he meets those two poseur friends of hers...negativity personified. Egads! (or Egan!)

The answer is "sometimes." Yes, hate is a household word. Like Bubba Gump Shrimp, or Sham-WOW. It rolls off the tongue without hesitation. Yours truly has fallen victim to the hate bug from time to time. One of those times was last night.

I attended a viewing of Game 1 of the Western Conference Finals (WCF) between the Denver Nuggets and the LA Lakers last night at my friend James' place. A small congregation of 30-somethings with an interest in seeing a decent game take place. What I saw...was a flashback!

[enter wacky arm motions, ala Wayne's World]

The year was 2000. The date was Sunday, June 4. The place was my friend Garon's living room. The situation was Game 7 of the WCF between the Lakers and our hometown Portland Trailblazers. The outcome was a fourth quarter, double-digit collapse by the Blazers, resulting in a series ender and eventual championship for the Lakers that year, the first of three straight for both Shaq and Kobe.

I thought I had a good handle on my hate thresholds prior to that day, but I was wrong. We we're all wrong. I had found a new reason to hate...a new vitriol so pure that nobody could ever claim it as their own. Nope. No way on God's green earth that you could ever exorcise me of the ill-will I wanted to inflict upon every player on that team (even A.C. Green!). Kobe and Shaq stole something from me that day. I was robbed.

Then came 2003. Kobe Bryant's sexual assault of a spa employee in Colorado hit the headlines. I hated this guy even more. Where does he get off thinking that the world revolves around him? There is a special place in my heart for people like that. Wait, no, there is a special place in my toilet for people like that! What a dirtbag! Yes the charges of rape were dropped, but I have my suspicions, plus the guy is still an adulterer. Shame on him. How dare he! It was all fuel for my hate fire.

So you can understand my feelings last night when Kobe scored the last four points for his team in a narrow two point victory over a very resilient Nuggets squad. I really hate this guy. I really hate the purple and yellow and I really hate that this douche bag gets to win championships. Hate, hate, hate, hate! I know that there are at least three more games to play, but if they end the way this one did, I'm going to have find an outlet for my frustration.

Maybe I'll write a song about my distaste for the Lakers? Maybe I'll quit my job as a seller of trade show exhibits and accessories and travel the world telling people how much I hate pompous Kobe and the Lakers.

Or maybe I just write about it, go have a beer and put on some James Blunt records!